| (no subject) |
[Sep. 6th, 2008|12:02 am] |
so where do i even start with this....
well....life sucks....
maybe i deserved it, who knows.
all i know is life came back to bite me in the ass
twice
too bad she'll never know how much i missed her these last 5 weeks
she'll never know how hard its been hanging out with my best friends and their gf's and i just sit aside and thought of her.
and after all the day dreams, all the sleepless nights filled with simple thoughts, she will never know what she did.
but thats just how some people are, it sucks
i should have seen it coming...
and too bad im the kind of guy who is willing to overlook a past and put his full trust in someone...
i have no clue where im going with this... |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 12th, 2008|03:04 pm] |
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Only now do I realize i actually lost my best friend.. |
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| hmph |
[Jun. 6th, 2008|02:17 am] |
you'd think i'd be happy...
i thought that too
though something still feels terribly wrong, something is just.....missing.
i dont know what else there is anymore, maybe i should just pack up and start anew, because this life isn't working out..=\ |
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| im in a lyrics mood this week |
[May. 12th, 2008|09:16 pm] |
shit maybe one day.. many years from now..
I set out on a narrow way many years ago
Hoping I would find true love along the broken road
But I got lost a time or two
Wiped my brow and kept pushing through
I couldn't see how every sign pointed straight to you
Every long lost dream lead me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you
I think about the years I spent just passing through
I'd like to have the time I lost and give it back to you
But you just smile and take my hand
You've been there you understand
It's all part of a grander plan that is coming true
Every long lost dream lead me to where you are
Others who broke my heart they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you |
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| till i collapse |
[May. 11th, 2008|11:42 pm] |
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'Cause sometimes you feel tired,
feel weak, and when you feel weak, you feel like you wanna just give up.
But you gotta search within you, you gotta find that inner strength
and just pull that shit out of you and get that motivation to not give up
and not be a quitter, no matter how bad you wanna just fall flat on your face and collapse. |
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| my late night thought from a few nights ago at 2 am |
[Apr. 27th, 2008|11:52 pm] |
life is way too short to live without a purpose.
whether you know it or not, every action makes a difference.
every sentence, every word, every feeling.
life is constantly changing.
dont be caught living the same day twice, make a difference..
find your purpose |
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| i love how there is always a song to tell how you feel |
[Apr. 15th, 2008|10:24 pm] |
People say she's only in my head
Its gonna take time to laugh again
They say I need to get on with my life
But they don't realize
Is when your dialing 6 numbers just to hang up the phone.
Driving cross town just to see if she's home.
Waking a friend in the dead of night, just to hear 'em say it's gonna be alright.
When your finding things to do not to fall asleep cuz you know she'll be there in your dreams.
Thats when she's
more than a memory
Took a match to everything she ever wrote
Watched her words go up in smoke
Tore all the pictures off the wall
But that aint helping me at all.
Cuz when your talking out loud and nobody's there
You look like hell and you just don't care
Drinking more than you've ever drank
Sinking down lower than you've ever sank
When you find yourself falling down upon your knees, praying to God, begging him PLEASE
That's when she's
More than a Memory
She's more
She's more
Cuz when your dialing her number just to hang up the phone
Driving cross town just to see if she's home
waking a friend in the dead of night, just to hear 'em say it's gonna be alright
When our finding things to do not to fall asleep cuz you know she'll be waiting in your dreams
That's when she's
More than a Memory
People say she's only in my head
Its gonna take time to laugh again |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 14th, 2008|02:08 am] |
there is no time greater then now that i just wish i was away...
i cant be here with all of this, i need something new, a fresh start. |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 2nd, 2008|05:37 pm] |
so i now have a new found love for tobacco
smokeless tobacco...dont worry, well as much..
no girl to kiss so no worries there either =P
haha |
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| the more optomistic side of life...=\ |
[Mar. 31st, 2008|12:50 am] |
"Love is always patient and kind. It is never jealous. Love is never boastful or conceited. It is never rude or selfish. It does not take offense and is not resentful. Love takes no pleasure in other people's sins but delights in the truth. It is always ready to excuse, to hope, and to endure whatever comes. There are three things that last faith, hope and love, and love is the greatest of these."
-A Walk to Remember
great love story...check it out |
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| danny led me to this song |
[Mar. 30th, 2008|10:17 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  depressed | ] |
Oh why cant I be what you need
a new improved version of me
but i'm nothing so good
no i'm nothing
just bones, a lonely ghost burning down songs
of violence of love and of sorrow
i beg for just one more tomorrow
where you hold me down fold me in
deep deep deep in the heart of your sins
I break in two over you
I break in two
And each piece of me dies
And only you can give the breath of life
But you dont see me, you dont...
here i'm in between darkness and light
bleached and blinded by these nights
where im tossing and tortured til dawn
by you, visions of you then youre gone
the shock lifts the red from my face
when i hear someone's taking my place
how could love be so thoughtless, so cruel
when all, all that i did was for you
i break in two over you
i break in two
and each piece of me dies
and only you can give the breath of life
but you dont see me you dont..
i break in two over you
i break in two
and each piece of me dies
and only you can give the breath of life
but you dont see me you don't...
i break in two over you
i break in two over you, over you
i break in two
i would break in two for you
now you see me
now you don't
now you need me
now you don't
sums up my life exactly.. |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 15th, 2008|01:58 am] |
fuck my life
this really sucks
no joke....when your best friend doesnt talk to you....doesnt care about what you say to them, doesnt care when you try to get them to feel better, doesnt care that you want to help.....makes me wonder why im here
ill tell you this from the bottome of my heart.
there are very few things that are keeping me alive, baseball, and my true freinds.....well i think i just lost 2 of the 3 amazing people i have in my life.....so i have no idea where im headed, because baseball looks like its going to go way down before it gets better....i hate how i only use this thing when im fucking depressed....sorry guys that you all have to see this from me.....
but right now....i dont think i could feel any worse.....and if i actually could....im scared to think of what might happen to me.. |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 13th, 2008|11:22 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  uncomfortable | ] |
so i had a weird ass dream as i feel asleep in the van on the way up to palomar for our game today...
for some reason or another i got kicked off the team, stopped going to school, moved away........and was happy....
i think....
we shall see....=\ |
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 11th, 2008|05:56 pm] |
dude....can nothing go right for me anymore?
damnit...
haha
this break has pretty much been lame/ a letdown
oh well
life goes on |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 19th, 2007|03:25 pm] |
this is what i live for?
well fuck me twice.. |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 2nd, 2007|12:43 am] |
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you know ive never really been the praying type of person....but ive sure had a lot to pray about lately...and not all of it is good.. |
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| Scott |
[Sep. 16th, 2007|12:37 am] |
ill miss you man
i dunno if UCLA is ready for ya!!
but we all you are ready for them haha
it was good seeing everyone together again one last time too
even kelly was there...good times...good times indeed |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 26th, 2007|11:17 pm] |
So summer has officially come to a close, and it was an absolute buitiful day
Spent the whole day outside pretty much at Aztec park, playin frisbee and having a home run derby..food, then back home where i took a very enjoyable nap. woke up intime to see the sunset, it was one of those times where i wish i had a really nice $900 camera...
So school at San Diego Mesa starts tomorrow, i have wieght lifting in the morning and then straight to Chem, so my classmates get to smell me all period =P
then i got sdsu marching band rehersal afterwards, from 1-3, there's my mondays and wednesdays
tuesday and thursday is a lil tougher....stats at 8, reading a comprehension right after, then i get almost a 2 hour break, then baseball practice, then another hour break, then Sociology till 5:30...oh boy... friday is one 3 hour chem lab followed by sdsu marching rehersal...
so im thinkin im gonna be working mon, wed, and sundays? thats assuming i can freakin find a job...or a fuckin application for the places i go to..
oh well, im off to bed...6 a.m. comes early.... |
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| Guitar Hero II |
[Aug. 15th, 2007|12:13 am] |
so i finally beat phycobilly freakout on expert on G.H. ive been stuck on it for two weeks, im happy...until it takes me another two weeks to beat hanger 18......oh well
so yea, pointless entry..good times..
peace |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 18th, 2007|09:21 pm] |
man, the last week i think the only thing ive done is see the new harry potter movie, other then that, and baseball practice in the morning, i havnt seen anybody or done anything at all, i feel all cooped up in my house, i need to get out!!!
haha
so that was a lame excuss to update this thing, but yea, life is slow, not too much to do lately, maybe its about time i finally look for a job, anybody got any ideas???
and yea, im not so sure on how baseball is gonna go for this upcoming year, there are 4 other catchers other then me goin out for the team, so 5 of us total, and there will only be 3 on the roster, and the third will pretty much just catch bullpins..so im gonna have to work my ass off to get a spot where i can play and get noticed by somebody(hopefully). so im definately a lil bit nervous about that, cuz now i might not even have baseball come next spring, and that would be horrible..so heres to a long year of working my ass off to make this team...and im already tired and sore. =P |
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